yeah ! Featured speaker in DC

I must admit that im really really rally proud (!) when I looked at the Drupalcon website and saw that my session " Building a frankenstein monster & how to maintain it has been picked as a featured session on the front page of the Drupalcon in washington DC Maybe thats why the forst 100 tickets were sold on 10 minuts? (an not the 125$ price tickets)

The last couple of years I have done a couple of sesion under the label: "Sex Drupal & Rock'n'Roll" and yes that session type will return again! So no worries the fuckedifukk fååårk fuck, the porn stars & code errors will return but this time i thought that my fascination of B movies should be honored - and especially the worst of them "Reptilicus" will be honored. You might ask WTF does shitty horror movies have to do about theme a website? well not that much but hey the slides will look really cool, and my style is not just ordinary slides I want it to have a theme and kick ass! - and this time im gonna include monsters !

The title reefers to that special kind of programming style (frankenstein coding), where you take 324 different bits and pieces of code and jam em together into a monster of code, that actually gets the job done - usually a pretty popular technique when deadlines are just around the corner, and the client begins to come with absurd demands.
So instead of pretending that it isnt that way a lot of project is gonna be coded, and especially when were talking
about drupal theming (the last stop before the page is created) -andman i have seen a lot of crap the last couple of years (yup even i do make mistakes ;)), especially when im called in as the clean up guy.

A couple of highlights, from the bag of pure evil drupal Theming:
* forms build directly into the template.php
* page tpls for each node
* loads of logic inside the tpls
* MySQL calls inside the tpls
* and the classic Hacks in core ()
One of reasons that programmers does these kind of evil is pure ignorance, and the idea of "just get this crap done" coding - the client is happy - were getting paid - so we dont give a ratts ass about upgrading later on.

That is a bad monster!

The good monster is that were you dont hack core (it kills kittens, make beers to warm, and is gonna haunt you later on), document wtf you doing and why. So you might have a opportunity to figure it out in 6 months.
and off course uses all kinds of homegrown in the last minute code fiddeling

Man im looking forward to the drupalcon in washington, how sweet is it that I can combine my work (which at the same time is my hobby) and travel the world :)